Behind Locked Doors

I've never written this blog; a post about my stays behind locked doors. In a children's mental hospital things can get complicated. At some point you start to like being there, sometimes you fall for the trap that it is. I've been hospitalized for eight to ten days, three separate times and once as partial. It's terrifying being in a place where you're not allowed to leave. Behind those doors things happen that normal people don't get to experience.

First off, you have "normies," who are the people who are only in there due to suicidal thoughts or attempts. I'm not trying to take away the importance of these people getting help, of course not, there are times where it's more important for someone like this to be taken care of then someone with a mental disorder. These are just people who have fallen on bad times or are lost in the discovery of finding themselves and need a direction to follow.

Then you have the "drug addicts,". These people are the ones who are going through withdraws because they're used to being hooked up on drugs. A lot of the time they have some crazy stories they'll tell you that you can't trust if they're true or not. They're kind of like normies, just good people who fall into bad times. Sometimes they are lost causes and nothing can change their mind except themselves. It takes will to change something that powerful such as an addiction.

There is the "trauma patients," who are those who are people who have witnessed or undergone something terrible and have side effects from it. A lot of the time it's an accident, or more common is sexual abuse. They're also usually suicidal which is understandable, but they need help nonetheless. I feel bad for these type of people. They're usually not open at all, or way too much.

"Bulls," are those who get mad very easily. I don't really have much to say about these kinds of people. It's not their fault. A lot of the time they just find their emotions to be too much. I find myself angry at times, a little too much more lately, but I wouldn' go as far as tossing a chair through the glass window or biting a staff member. A lot of the times though, these people are properly medicated once you meet them and rarely react.

"Commons," these are the types of people you are unsure if they actually have anything wrong with them. A lot of the times it's just anxiety. I met a few people like this that I really tend to like. Even if they have a major disorder, these people are pretty chill and fun to be with. I find that most of those that are in the hospital end up like this by the end of their stay. I was actually sad to see them go because it was really fun spending time with them.

And, finally there is one more that I'm going to talk about today. Me, which is basically someone who isn't like anyone else in the group. It's the "Outcast among the outcasts," that just stands out from everyone else. Sometimes I was this person and sometimes I wasn't. I find everyone ends up being this person, or feeling like this one, at some point during their stay. It's a crazy ride and there are plenty of people to meet that don't follow this. Don't be scared if you meet someone who has anger issues or can't tell the difference between reality and fiction sometimes because as long as you're behind those locked doors you're safe. It's the one place nobody can get you. Not even the demons in your head.