Sometimes I wish I could sell my morals away to people who need them, because as stated in a past blog entry I'm sick of being a goody two shoes. Ever sense I bought the new Imagine Dragons album I been questioning all the music I listen to on YouTube finding myself with two choices; A. Buy the music, B. Don't listen to it. Which sucks because if I do listen to it I feel bad now and can't enjoy it... in other words I'm pretty sure that morals suck.
My good friend Zeus doesn't believe in morals at all, finds them overrated. Then again, Zeus has a knack for everything being overrated. On the other-hand my online friend who I'll call Virus has the best morals I know. She won't even buy the newest video game because she'll only play it once, despite her family has the most wealth out of the three of us. I'm not so sure if I understand morals much at all... for someone who has been tempted by the corruption surrounding in my daily life I haven't even dented my purity.
All I know is I don't like to sell myself short, if you question my morals I will know the answer in a moment. For example in my class last year the teacher has each student write things we believed in then each of us said it out loud. If we agreed with it we went to the front of the room, disagree we went to the back. I survived near to all of the questions before the one that sort of made me outcast came up; "I believe in God!" screamed out a young man to my left. At first I stood still remaining in the front but I shook my head slowly moving to the back of the room. Because I refuse to sell myself out and that means standing up for my morals.
Now before anybody says anything about the religion, it isn't a for sure thing. Currently, I'm at a state where I'm unsure of reality and fiction. I am questioning pretty much everything that I possibly can, especially religion. Although, I will say it's not simply a phase as I have been against the theory of God for the past few years. That's a story for another time though, because if I plan on becoming the person I want to be I'll have to face it as well.
Back onto topic, morals make me feel like I have little choice on the matter. Despite, the fact that I am allowed to I have decided never to curse. Even as a small child I only spoke the words once, after my mother told me what they were I went into my room and screamed them out loud so they would be out of my system. It worked. The only time I have ever cursed now is when I wish to use the symptom for underworld in a story and google it or when my parents thought it be funny to make me... I cried... I was nine...
When I was younger my father would tell me that I was an angel, with the power to heal. Now I don't think he meant it so literally. Perhaps, he meant I have a good soul and that my hands could change the world; healing the corrupting the best I could. Like, Zeus once asked me "Are you a floater or a changer?" asking if I pass by life or if I interact with it? So maybe my morals aren't so bad after all, it could mean I have the potential to spread my wings and share my cure to the world.
Or not?
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