Countdown

Waiting, is a terrible feeling to experience especially when it's a few days before a big show that will greatly alter the ending of the story. With time ticking down I can't help but ponder on what could possibly go wrong, then I wake up in the middle of the night with a sore throat. Like, bad sore throat. Not so much that I couldn't do the show, but more to where I need to be sure not to get the rest of the cast sick. For once in my life I don't want to "wait for it," I want to get it on the road and drive this puppy home.

There are plenty of other things going on that cross with this plot, so many side story lines that could take the lead. Like, my father having a tooth surgery tomorrow, Reed about to graduate, Gem and I still being friends despite my attempts, Virus planning my visit, and Zeus dating a new girl who I've yet to meet up close, but she seems nice from online. Not to mention all the mental stability quirks I have that seem to only be getting much worse as I'm sleeping less and working more with the backstage drama class.

I know I've covered that pausing and skipping is not only impossible, but unwise. Except in this case I know what happens in the future and while I don't want to skip over it, because it'll be a memorable moment for me, I do want to fast forward to it. I don't want to wait for this sickness to pass. I just don't want to wait for tonight to pass. For tomorrow to drag on by. Knowing what happens next makes waiting for it so much more difficult.

Time is ticking down on me, my wasted seconds are being eaten away, but instead it feels as if time is stopping to pee on each and every piece of grass. Why does time slow down? Things seem to speed up when you're having fun, but slow down when you're waiting on something? Wouldn't that prove that time is simply an illusion of our minds connected to our mental and emotional state? So does time exist at all?

That's something you have to ask yourself, something I can't figure out on my own. It's more of an opinion based question as it's impossible to test. All I know is I have a countdown over my head ticking down at the slowest pace possible and while I may want it to speed up once it's here I'll wish to go back. I get the feeling after this show goes up in flames, likily because of me, all I want to do is rewind.